The next time you catch yourself judging someone for their clothing, hobbies, or interests ask yourself “what does it matter to me?” The more you train yourself to not care about the personal preferences of other people, the more relaxed you become. You become a nicer person
Bonus if you can ask yourself why you’re judging someone, it may help get to the root. We all like to make connections & associations but if you drill down to the “why”, you can really start to address the implicit biases.
If you plan subscribing to a service. First investigate how to unsubscibe to that service. If it’s not straight forward, or have reports of being troublesome – it indicates the company’s main business model is to rip you off, instead of providing a quality service.
Any service that allows 1 tap sign up but to cancel you have to call them or do something else other than 1 tap cancel from account settings is just garbage. cough gyms cough.
You should check everywhere on your body every once in awhile to see if you have a new mole or a body mark bigger than an eraser at the top of a pencil.
If you see you have a new mole or body mark on your body that wasn’t there before, go to the doctor because it could be skin cancer.
The ABCDE rule which signals for signs of melanoma (skin cancer) A= ASYMMETRY: if 2 half’s look different it could be skin cancer B= BORDER: a round smooth border of the mole or skin mark is a good sign, but if it has a unnatural border, get it checked out. C= COLOR: one color is good, but multiple colors could be a sign of skin cancer. D= DIAMETER: if once again, it’s bigger than a pencil erasers, it could be a sign of skin cancer. E= EVOLUTION: if it has change in size, color, or shape, get it checked out.
When applying for jobs, disregard the “X+ years of experience required”
I work as an agency recruiter and help people get their resumes in front of hiring managers on a daily basis. The “X+ years of experience required” isn’t typically a hard requirement unless applying for a job with a defense contractor. Having a similar skill set as the one listed in the job description is much more important than anything else. Also, when applying to entry level jobs, disregard the “X+ years of experience required”. If it is tagged as entry level, most of the time a college degree and internship experience will be sufficient to be considered for the role. Internal HR departments tend to work slowly and recycle job descriptions instead of creating new ones all of the time. When I post jobs, I would much rather see someone with the skill set who has less experience than someone who has the required/more experience, but doesn’t match the skill set. 9/10 times, I will get the person with less experience an interview over someone who has the years of experience, but doesn’t fully match the description.
Kindness is contagious and shows strength. If you hold the door open for the person behind you, let someone into traffic while driving (even if they made a mistake) or simply smile at someone, that person is more likely to do the same for someone else, and so on.
You have to be okay with having uncomfortable talks with people if you are ever going to be able to have a real meaningful relationship. The fear of being uncomfortable should never outweigh the need to have a conversation. If you are afraid to talk about it, it probably means you really should talk about it.
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Any conversation had while emotions are running wild is non-productive. If you or whoever you are talking with cant talk without yelling or being nasty take a break, calm down, and come back to it later.
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When having a conversation i think it should be about presenting your perspective and feelings. Notice that i say conversation and not argument. I think arguments are not great and the word argument sounds like there will be a “winner”. That is just not how a relationship should work imo.
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If you have trouble with this in your relationship, practice. Present small opportunities to bring up little issues even if everything feels fine. I call them “check ins” with my SO. It is a good opportunity to get comfortable talking about things we might otherwise struggle to find the time to bring up and it strengthens our communication skill. It also keeps resentment away because we handle everything immediately.
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Communication is a skill. It is learned and it takes time and that is okay.
“Never let it be me versus you. It should always be us versus the problem.”
If you already have a dog and are planning on getting another, introduce them by immediately walking them together the 1st time they meet. The distraction of the walk keeps them from getting possibly hostile and gives them time relax and adjust to another dog during a fun activity for them
Also, have them meet on neutral territory, not in the house!
Never loan someone an amount of money you aren’t okay losing permanently. You need to mentally consider it a gift and consider the money gone. So many people are terrible at paying back so when you consider it a gift it is a nice surprise if the money comes back. If not you really helped them
When someone is going through a difficult time and is sharing it with you, don’t talk about similar problems you’re having as a way to relate. Instead, just listen.
When someone’s sharing something difficult that they’re going through, so many people get this urge to “empathize” by replying with similar struggles of their own. This is one of the worst things you can do when someone is trying to get something off their chest to you.
Instead of talking about yourself, just listen to them. Make them feel heard. Ask questions and help them work through it themselves. More often than we realize, people just to need to feel validated and heard when they’re going through something personally difficult.
A real, effective apology has three parts: (1) Acknowledge how your action affected the person; (2) say you’re sorry; (3) describe what you’re going to do to make it right or make sure it doesn’t happen again. Don’t excuse or explain
Theodore Lee is the editor of Caveman Circus. He strives for self-improvement in all areas of his life, except his candy consumption, where he remains a champion gummy worm enthusiast. When not writing about mindfulness or living in integrity, you can find him hiding giant bags of sour patch kids under the bed.