(photo: @mikamatin)
No one gets through life unscathed. And while it is 0% your fault that these things happen to you, it is 100% your responsibility to deal with the aftermath of what your situation has given to you.
I had one client a few years ago who blamed all of his life’s shortcomings on the fact that his father had been largely absent during his childhood.
Having emotionally unavailable parents is a hinderance, no doubt. So is having one of your best friends die. So is being raped. So is being bullied for years. So are a lot of things that happen to people, every day, around the world.
At a certain point in our working relationship, I had to tell him that the pain that he felt on account of his dad not being around was real, but the fact that he was still blaming his father for all of his life’s shortcomings more than thirty years later wasn’t helping him.
When we blame other people for aspects of our lives, we shrug off the tough work of taking responsibility for ourselves.
I’ll say that again…
If you’re blaming others, you’re avoiding responsibility in your life
Take back your power by forgiving the people you have felt victimized by, and get on with your life.
No one is coming to save you. At a certain point in your journey, you have to pick yourself up by your socks and tell yourself, “How my life goes is up to me. I’m going to become a bigger person now, and stop copping out by blaming other people for my life’s circumstances.”
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